Even if Ryu-mun never did see those condenscedfnfkdbfgnkdbf--can't spell. Put together Yu-Gi-Oh episodes.

This five-minute icon was brought to you by: Photoshop, where more bullshit is produced then not.

I like having Duo's main icon change as he changes.

http://www.makenai.org/tsubasa/trans.html --tranlations (hopefully...haven't finished downloads yet) for after vol. 13----oh, nope, these are just scripts. damn.



http://bwys.cjb.net/--cahpter 1-13 scanalations posted for T:RC

All right.

Change of plans.

I was going to have the turning point for Duo be when he starts up the Deathscythe and it explodes--his group-complex and how much he really does depend on other people to survive sometimes and that's not meant literally, but figuratively--during the course of the show, he gets a little sad when he's away from his fellow pilots for too long--things like that--Duo needs people and this was going to be the turning point where he decides to change for good.

But, due to the recent events between--Kimishima, Hilde, Reno, and especially Ryuhou--I don't feel I can do that.

I don't want to pour in too much drama at the moment. ^_^ Ryuhou's got the floor right now--it's his turn to dance.

So. Instead of blowing up the Deathscythe now.

I'm gonna wait it out. So it'll work for now, instead of blowing up--and his character changes will come later.


Ah, sacrifice in storyline--but I don't see any other alternative. There's so much going on right now, and no offense to Ryu-mun, because you know I love you--but especially with Ryuhou--that I don't feel it's the time for something like what I was planning.

Duo wasn't going to get hurt. Hardly at all, just a broken limb or something, and he realizes that it's his turning point--but I don't think this is the right time. Because an explosion would attract a lot of attention and it would bring Hilde back. So, sorry Hilde-mun. But not quite yet--or perhaps she come over anyway, who knows. No matter what he said to her in the log. *sniff*


So. The Gundam is going to work for now.

So, Alfons, either you or Kazuma get the first ride, depending on who gets there first. ^_^ And Princess Miwako--and depending on what's happening at that point...maybe, maybe not. (Oh the poor drama if it blew up while he was with Miwako--because nothing has ever happened to Miwako yet (except puppy-murder).

*am totally trying to be a good writer, whut*


*suddenly realizes that all comments are screen for some weird-ass reason, goes off to find that setting. WTF, yo?*

When and how did all my icon get back?

*is confuzzled*

Typically, I hate drama. I hate melodramatics and stuff like that. But of course, on this island--with all these characters there will always be drama. It's a contrantly shifting storyline--that's what it's all about.


Hence my workings with Duo.

I have taken...*counts*...almost 3 and a 1/2 months to get him to this point. I didn't plan all this out, obviously---you can't plan an rp like you can a book. But there were landmarks--it was just getting between each landmark.

For example. When he arrived, I'd planned from the very beginning that he would start to lose himself. And I can back that up--a whole long paragraph. But I'll save you--and me--the time and space. Go read this. Everything I've always thought and pondered about Duo psychologically--written by someone else in a cool essay. And eventually start to lose his sanity---this would've happened a lot quicker if Hilde hadn't shown up. So I was grateful when she did. Because insanity might equal death for Duo. And he is my primary character (so it's been weird having him off the board entirely for so long) and I love him. But I woudl sacrifice for the sake of the storyline. Plots and storylines are very important to me.

He was all right, at first. He managed to get Materia, he made a couple friends and then got invovled with Ryuhou--which is what starts the downfall. Plus the constant tension between being friends and wanting to kill each other that went back and forth between the three of them. Add in the Mello-factor and you've got a really strong drink. And because of Duo's 'group complex'--well, he hates it, but he always comes back to it. Because Duo can't let go.

That is primarily why he is so obsessed about rebuilding his Gundam and doing it himself--not that he grudges Alfons, at all, he understands and appreciates his eagerness to help--but Duo cannot let go of things. Particularly people and his Gundam. He's always on the hunt for a constant, a support--a group of friends. Growing up with other street kids, you learned to depend on each other, and that's what he's he's still doing.

So anyway, back to the goddamn point. As soon as Kurogane went with Kazuma to Clam Island and made the place a madhouse, and later brought Duo in...I thought, at first, to merely have his encounter with the 'angle'--I changed my mind and decided I would work on two things.

1. His constant need for people, when he's by himself too long he starts to question himself, lose himself a little bit at a time
2. He doesn't believe in God--but he wants to...and he was afraid to die (he's not anymore)...hence, like the essay says--he took on this 'persona' of the God of Death so he calls the shots. But, essentially, he's running from it.


Then things between Ryuhou and Duo escalated--information leaked, they stopped, Duo became much better friends with Kazuma and Hilde showed up. He got really possessive and weird about the Materia, acted like he needed it. But in the back of his mind...is always the call of the angels. I gave him an extra obsession because of his deal about God--and whether or not he believe in God.

[[This ended up getting a little weird. I left what exactly Duo got answered vague on purpose--it's for his knowledge and his alone. But the Angels do not have to necessarily represent sin. That was just Duo's take on them. That was why he was so obsessed with them...because of his things with God and if angels existed and all that. And he's consumed by guilt. So he was hoping that these might be real angels (even though, deep down, I think he knew they weren't--but he was hoping against hope) and he might find solace somewhere. I'm not saying what anyone did in the log was wrong! I was just surprised. ^_^ The angels really would have let Duo go if he'd handed over the Pyramid. For reasons I haven't decided yet, they can't just 'take' it.]]


So the second piece of my agenda has been taken care of. My first one, I can now begin to work on. I'm changing him, yes. Not OOC--I've been building up to this for months, after all...but I'm changing him a little.

It starts after this log ends. He's changed. Although you can't tell, at first--because of his distress at finding out that Hilde knows what he did and she basically hates his guts. He has to learn to let go.

-So. By force, he's letting go of Hilde--who he values most.

-He has also, as a note, given up his hatred of Mello and Near. He believes that there is no point to it anymore. He shouldn't be sucked into hating him. And Hilde already knows what he did and found out in a worse way than any he could've imagined. To him, people are people. And he always knew...but when he got to this Island and started to change--he forgot that. Someone like Mello wouldn't have bothered him back home because he had a group of friends and wasn't alone anymore. But here he'd been alone and was slowly starting to get insecure--especiallydoes</i> have a point. It's not just drama for the sake of drama. At that time, Duo will have lost all his constants and supports, be at his very lowest and will have to start from scratch to get up again.

He'll have his friends. Kazuma, Reno--Ryuhou, I assume (Right, Ryuhou-mun?), possibly Hilde won't hate him forever, and various others....but the important thing he has to learn to do is to let go.

And, even more important--to be able to function completely on his own and not lose himself. He'll come back up again, rework himself and he'll be stronger. He'll joke and and all that again--but right now, he can't. Not until his Gundam is destroyed completely and he realizes not just his mistakes--but why they were mistakes.

Hence, he will grow and develop as a character.

So yeah, just wanted to get all that out. I've been talking to myself about this for awhile. Just wanted to see some of it written.

I am so freakin' hungry.

I want some hash browns.

Right now.

The best line from this log so far...

Is this one::


Hilde: ....and he would recount tales of the other Gundam pilots to her--the deep, surly voice he used for Heero, the way he wrung his hands and threw himself around the room in full damsel-in-distress-mode for Relena or even sometimes Quatre.


That cracked me up. Kudos to you, Hilde-mun!

Just thought this conversation between Kazuma and Duo in the mountain was kinda funny--considering recent events.

Yay. That's all really. Duo shot him again. *snort*

You know what else sucks?


I'd love to send Kurogane and Duo to the Island of Crazy together. Because, not only are they cool characters, but I think they are incredibly interesting shadows of each other.

Kurogane is, quite possibly, what Duo will grow up to be.

Duo didn't start killing when he was seven or eight or whatever (I actually have no idea when Kurogane started killing, I made that number up)--but he's always been on his own from as far back as he can remember. He became a murderer and now he's struggling to cope with what he's done.

Kurogane, meanwhile, has already bypassed all that, probably a long time ago and came to enjoy killing. I don't think that Duo would ever enjoy killing just for the hell of it--like Kurogane used to.

...but the main point is that...Duo [and Kazuma, if I think about it, except he's incredibly more hot-headed then Duo or Kurogane and he's a mad brawler] is at a place where Kurogane used to be. I think the two of them traveling together alone would be incredibly interesting.

But, as I'm playing both of them, I don't think that would be possible. I'm not sure if I would be good enough. Hell, I don't even know if how I play Kurogane is becoming of his character. I'm very self-crytical. *laughs* So I think everything I do will probably suck. And I don't want to play them so...ah, how to explain this...so in character that they're out of character. Like...overdoing it. I don't want to do that because that makes it unnatural. Plus, I'd be talking to myself. So...that would be kind of would. And an entire log of talking to myself would just...be weird. And I'd have no other input to play off of. Writing a seven or nine page log for Kurogane is one thing--writing an entire log between two characters that I play, by myself...that's entirely different.

Now, I can put myself in different states of mind, yeah. I've had Duo and Kurogane interact and I think it came out...okay. Not bad. I can seperate my brain so that when I log in as Duo or Kurogane I'm in certain...mindset. But I don't think I could do a whole log. Almost makes me wish someone else was playing Kurogane (I'd never let anyone else touch Duo) but then, I love Kurogane too--and I get possesive protective of my two characters but I really would love to explore how Duo would interact with a character who's older and has more experience than he does...but is also someone who can be as stern and mean as Kurogane can be sometimes.

It's not like with Heero. Duo looks up to Heero because he was trained to be a killer, is an excellent pilot and he's very, very strong. And with Duo's complex about being in a group--Heero's the 'older kid' that the 'younger kids' looked up too. I think they have a strange relationship....of almost older brother-younger brother...but not quite....because Duo knows he's got just as many skills as Heero, and in some cases, his skills are even better. There are things he's better than Heero at---stealth, he has a knack for precise control of a plane/vehicle/whatever when it comes to control--his flying skills can't be matched, he's damn sneaky and keen as a knife...what underminds him is that he's more of a civilian. The church burned and everyone died when he was eight. He was absolutely alone until he was 13 or 14--and it's never told what happened inbetween those years. He's a survivor, yeah--and he's got a bit of a reputation when he snuck aboard and cracked Prof. G's dalicate, top-notch security system--the guys there knew who he was, even though he never said his name to them until later but you never find out why they all knew him--except for being the only survivor of the Maxwell Church Massacre--but he must have done something else. Not all guys who have braids and wear black are Duo Maxwell--they knew it was him. And only then did he ever start his official training (as far as we know) to be a Gundam pilot. So he's not as smart when it comes to certain things...like, at the beginning when he met Heero. He should never have let Heero get so close to his Gundam. He probably shouldn't have bothered saving him from that hospital. In some ways, Duo can be too trusting...which is why he goes and try to make friends too fast. He trusts them too quickly without seeing what they are really capable of---like with Mello and Micheal. He didn't bother getting information about either of them. And now he loathes both of them.

But it would be different because, in my opinion, Kurogane outclasses even Heero. If some fight were ever arranged between the two of them, I would, without a doubt, put my money (or perhaps candy, because there's no money on this island to bet) on Kurogane.

That, and Kurogane would actually interact with him. Heero just sort of tolerated him, then became his friend--but he still never really spoke to him and Heero was very, very subtle in showing his friendship with Duo [ie, he steals Duo's parts to keep him and the Deathscythe out of the next fight, when he comes to kill Duo, he decides not too...because he sees that Duo is afraid to die--that and I just don't think he really wanted to by that point]. Kurogane would talk to him...hell, might even teach him something, which Duo would be glad to learn. He's got pride--but it's not like with Kazuma. He can [most of the time] admit it when he knows he's wrong and if Kurogane has gone to that island alone, succeeded where he failed [and succeed where he would know he would fail--Duo, at this point, wouldn't be able to handle going to the island alone--and he knows it], and then had the chance to go back with him--and maybe even have Kurogane teach him something about other weapons---Duo would take up the chance in a heartbeat...


Dammit!

Grah. I wish I were a better writer. Ah well, they'll interact when the expedition goes to Clam Island.

So far it looks like....Kurogane, Vincent [now that's another interesting pair...Kurogane and Vincent are alike in many ways--except Kurogane has a sense of humor], Duo, Ryuhou, Kazuma...and Mello, right? Will all be going back together.

Bah. Ah well.

Ryuhou, Kazuma--you two are cracking me up with your log.


I keep laughing, thinking of the hilarity and if Kurogane were to to suddenly walk in--for his own reaction as well as theirs.

And I know, I know, I said I'd leave it to you. And I'm going to. But it's still fucking hilarious.

All the boards are very quiet tonight.


I wish the mods would accept some of the new applicants. I wonder why they're waiting so long? They've hardly accepted anyone. Do they only do it on certain days now?

Damn, maybe I'll just go to bed.

As far as Duo goes--m'writing a log for him so he can have some time working on his Gundam and introspection and all that. Lots of fun. And he breaks his leg--but he's got Restore Materia so it's all good. Thank God for Vincent (and not just for that *grin*).



On a completely different note. I was suppose to retark an exam for my playwriting class (which, by the way, I turned in my first script--a kind of dark comedy--and it was read yesterday and seemed to go over pretty well...)...but I went to take it and no one is there. Which is aggravating as I wanted to get it done and over with. But, while I was trying to find my professor (our acting studio--which holds the, obviously, acting, directing and playwriting classes is in the basement) I wandered into the laundry facility. Because people tend to forget and leave shit and to me--if it's there for more than a couple days--it's free game. So I managed to get a nice grey shirt from Express (which is hilarious as I would never shop there, but then again, I hate shopping) and, if you'll believe this--it fits me perfectly and some of that super-expensive stain remover shit. And, satisfied with my findings of these--if not my professor--I now come back to my dorm to listen to my music and continue writing out Duo's log.


I like writing about Duo because people always portray him, as, basically an airhead and he had so much depth that's never explored. I love those parts of him. I love him as a character and I think that's why I get so attached to him.


I must shower soon today but this new grey shirt is pretty damn comfortable. I'll have to wear it today. =D


Just for the record....Indiana's weather seems to be settling down a bit. It's a beautiful day outside.

*is on the western beach*


Damn, I was trying to remember how to make lye soap.

Y'need....ash wood, water, lard...shit...plant oils, like...palm oil or cocoa butter or something...and I think salt.

I know y'gotta heat it all up and stuff....dammit, Quatre would know somethin' like this.


*ponders*

I'm on this weird medicine now--Klonopin or some such shit.


I feel pretty good on it--except now I have a really hard time waking up in the morning. XD I used to be able to just wake up. Now I've been late to my History of Ireland class almost everyday this week and last.

But it's well worth it, I think. I've been feeling a lot better lately.

I'm up for another long night. Are you?


And I went over to the college and got my Gundam Wing dvds. Because I love them.


So, since this is an RP journal--am I technically not suppose to be writing in it?


I have no damn clue. :(

I feel the blind urge to scowl.

What the hell?

Where the hell is Heero? And...Hilde...?

*scowl*

This is like when Solo died. Damn.

No. Seriously.

Your mom's a test post.